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Tuesday, May 30, 2006
Finally understand what it feels like to be my mum. yet i also understand what it feels like to be my dad. yet it is so difficult to reconcile the two feelings that i go through. one is that my mum needs to work to support my family. we are going through tough financial times due to a commitment made earlier. thats why she is unable to reject some of the things that the company ask her to do like travel and stay back late becoz she can't afford to lose her job. as for my dad, he's angry with my mum and the company for the very same reasons that my mum is angry about. making her travel, equals losing time spent with the family.
recently i am told that i have to spend a month in penang for work purposes. my gf wasn't very happy about it. i am also not very happy about it. thats coz i do not like spending time away from people that matter to me. but i know i have to do it coz of the obligations that i have. also the fact that i am working at my mum's company, i dun wan her reputation to be in the mud bcoz of me. thats why i have to agree with the decisions made. i can easily reject it and probably even leave if i want to, coz i believe i can find work outside. but the main driving force behind me doing so was bcoz i dun wanna disappoint my mum.
all i can do now is to pray and ask God for a vision. i want to know what can i do as His son, and my mother's son, and as an employee at this company. by His will i will do anything, as long as it comes from Him.
Speakth at... 8:14 PM
Saturday, May 27, 2006
am currently going through a rough spot in my life with regard to my family. sometimes i wonder why do we humans work so hard for? i look at my family and it seems to be the same thing.
My dad works really long hours. he starts work at 6am, and doesn't get home till around 8pm, sometimes even later at 9pm. my mum starts work at 9am and doesn't get home until about 9pm as well. if you look at my house, you'd agree that i am pretty well to do. i live in a condo at a prime district, i have4 computers at home. the tv i in the living room is big. not projector size but quite big already. i have aircon that fills all the rooms when it is required. and the furniture is quite splendid. however, there is no joy in my house. parents are going through a rough patch now. constantly arguing coz of money issues. dad complains that mum flys too much to China, Hong Kong etc. such is the working life. where work takes over other important things,. such as family, exercise, friends etc. i worry for my family coz i dunno how long more i can take the stress i am going through now.
all i can do is to ask God to teach me to understand what to do. whatever he wills me to do, i will do. even if it is difficult for me to comprehend at that time. in the past i have disobeyed the will of God coz i thought it didn't make sense to me at that time, and in the end i have to bear the consequences. and i am still bearing some of the consequences of my disobedience. all i can ask if for God to see me through, and to grant me the strength to accept whatever comes my way.
Speakth at... 8:38 PM
Thursday, May 25, 2006
Hey you whoever's reading my very first blog post. To be honest, i just wanted an avenue to release some thoughts or pent up frustration that i have been harbouring inside of me. That's why i started this blog. Will add some stuff on it as time goes. ciao!
Speakth at... 11:02 PM
+ ernest tan
+ singaporean
+ gemini
+ rat
+ attached and in love
+ university student
+ biathlete cum waterboy
+ sporty
+ fun loving
+ exercise freak
+ friendly
+ impatient
+ Christian
+ water polo
+ swimming
+ running
+ chatting with friends
+ eating good food
+Road Bike
+Harry Potter 7th Book
+Aasics Gel kayano shoes x3